Kita Hanya Merancang, Tuhan Yang Menentukan

I used to write cards or letters for my friends each time they faced difficulties in life. I found it very easy for me to pen down my thought asking my friends to remain calm or steadfast-in short, “don’t worry, everything is going to be fine”.

However, when the similar event took place in one of the most important part in my life, I could not find the right response to calm myself. A month ago, my A-levels results were announced and unfortunately, I did not make the grades.

Sometimes, it took us to experience a real life scenario for us to understand certain things. People often say that their lives took a different turn whenever something unplanned occurred along the journey. I suppose my case is also the same. Each time I look at the clock, I wonder what is left for me. I wonder what went wrong and I cannot avoid but to question why I was given such test.

I would not go into details of what really happened. Suffice to say that I did not make the grades. Most of my friends are already in a foreign land, preparing for the exciting moment of meeting new friends, exploring the unknowns and more importantly, they can now see the world.

I know that this may sound like self-pity, but I am also a human being and I cannot run away from the feeling of disappointment and frustration; we are not immune from such feelings. I am lucky to have my parents around since they are very supportive. But that is where it breaks my heart so much when I knew they were hoping something good came up from me.

I can go on and on lamenting the past, but nothing is going to change. One can only reflect and only then, we can move on. As cliché as it sounds, things happen for a reason. I hope one day the lessons will reveal themselves and the moment they did, my heart and mind are ready to embrace changes and embark on another journey.

Courage is found in unlikely places. I think I have found mine and it is found in the most unlikely place. May the stars shine upon the end of my road!